Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Randomize
