Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
