i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
