went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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