At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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