I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
