like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
