Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Also, beer. Big fan.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
