new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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