i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
