My hair reeks of homosexuality.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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