Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
