The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
