Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
