ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
