So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
