Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
