he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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