ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
