i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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