I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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