Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
