Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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