ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Randomize