She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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