people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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