nut hugger
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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