Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize