It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
