How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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