So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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