Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
