so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
