Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Randomize
