He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize