i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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