i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
