It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
