Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
