she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
