I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
