Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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