so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Randomize
