at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
