so let's talk penis.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize