I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Randomize