Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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