your thong is hanging out like whoa
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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