belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
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