Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
